I love reading what others say as sometimes, they say it better than I can! Such is the case here where we are looking at how to get from where you are to where you want to be.
Darren Hardy, the publisher of Success Magazine, says, "Picture where you are in an (any) area, right now. Now picture where you want to be: Richer, thinner, happier, you name it. The first step toward change is awareness. If you want to get from where you are to where you want to be, you have to start by becoming aware of the choices that lead you AWAY (emphasis mine) from your desired destination...."
While Darren Hardy says the above, I would change one word in his last sentence. That word is "have to" which leads a person into bondage. A better word would be "get to." If I were to rewrite his last sentence, it would then read, "....If you want to get from where you are to where you want to be, you get to become aware of the choices that lead you AWAY (emphasis mine) from your desired destination..." Read both sentences and please contact me with how you feel reading each one or if you don't feel any different.
I am asking you to look at the words you speak to see if they create expectations around actions which creates bondage. "Have to" is one of those phrases that puts you in bondage when you use it. When we substitute "get to" for many of the shoulds, oughts, must, need to, or have to bondage words, we give ourselves permission to do something. It creates an easier pathway for you to move forward rather than having to overcome the "have to" that you put yourself under. Additionally, bondage words are lies. You were created, by our creator, with free choice. But you likely don't speak choice. You likely speak bondage words.
Apply yourself to changing your bondage words to "get to", "I want to", "I choose to", "I don't want to but I'm still choosing to"...and so on. SPEAK THE TRUTH IN YOUR MIND AND WITH YOUR TONGUE! You were given free choice.
BONDAGE VS. FREEDOM WORDS/STATEMENT
Bondage statement: I don't see how this will work.
Freedom statement: How can I accomplish this? What do I get to do for this to happen?
The bondage statement above will keep a person stuck while the freedom statement opens the creative juices flowing to solve the problem or situation. The freedom statement is also setting up the person to start their initiative, causing action to take place, and action breeds success (if it's the right action).
If you want to be successful, change your words! Evaluate what bondage words you are using and create a system to "notice' what you are thinking and break this thinking habit by doing your system!
There are a couple of steps you can take to creating awareness, as Daren Hardy expounds:
Evaluate where you are for a week, in regard to using bondage words, or at least for 5 days if you decide you can't keep "noticing" for a whole week.
Ask someone close to you (and who will support your growth in this area) to call you out if you are using bondage words.
Wear a rubber band and when you think or say bondage statements, snap it (helps to create awareness, a little pain and change).
Put sticky notes of freedom words around where you life to remind you to use them (I did this--it WORKS!).
In a month, "notice" or become aware of how you are doing and check in with those around you. Trust me, it won't take a month to feel different and I look forward to hearing about it!
In His Service,
Nancy